Those of you who follow my blog, one as far as I can tell, may know that I am not the most avid blogger. Well, folks that's gonna change. Ok, so I've said that before. Well, perhaps I haven't. I think I've implied it. I do believe at one time I've said that I was going to write in this thing everyday. Um, guess what? I haven't. Damn.
The thing is, I'm tired of not being a writer. I'm tired of sitting on my ass cashing in on something besides who I am. I'm tired, though I will continue to do it, of using my shoulders, my back, my eyes, my muscles, my bones to generate cash flow. I'd much rather write. Write and....damn it...I hate to say it...brand myself so create cash flow. I'd much rather tap my fingers along keys to create content than to tap a screen or lift a box (or to make and delivery pizzas like I used to do) to pad my wallet. I'd much rather learn how to create an image of myself online, network, and hock my words instead of looking at lines of pajama people, butt pants people, kids, and weary travelers wanting to gas, candy, hot dogs, corn dogs, beer, burgers, cigs, pop, pizza, and lottery tickets. It's not that I hate my job. It's a nice place. Cool people. It's just that I'm 45 and thinking to myself WTF am I doing?
WTF am I doing? Well, I'm not writing. Sorry folks, it's the truth. I'm not secretly offline jotting down lines or editing lines already written. I'm watching Vikings, Outsiders, Agents of Shield,Thor, CNN, MSNBC, and...you get it. Most of my down time is spent gazing at tube instead of placing words upon a page or screen. Okay, so I also read. I read Facebook posts. I read links from Facebook posts. I get distracted. I get curious. Reading is supposed to enhance one's writing, or so some folks say. I'm reading War and Peace. Sure its long. But for the the most part, it's not that hard of a read, if you can get past the first 150 pages. I'm also hiking. And drinking beer. I'm not writing. I'm wasting.
Wasting time wishing. Wasting time wondering. Wasting time thinking that I wasted time for far to long. Wasting time wondering what I am doing wasting time. Wasting time peering at pages and screens wondering about writing. Wondering if I should give it up, give up the dream. The dream lingers even if the actions, as of late, seem to not support it. Wondering if my college years reading literature and writing academic and creative pages was a waste. Wondering if my after college years traveling, reading, writing, drinking, exploring ideas, working at pizza and retail have been a waste. Wondering if I, twenty years ago, should have dove into something like computers and kept lit and writing as sides. No. Yes. No. Argh.
I loved lit, in all its forms. I still do. I love stories. I love to hear them, read them, create them, and learn from them. I love poetry. I love a well done essay. I love words that take you in. I love flow tap rhythms and images that pop like whispers, licking the mind.
I pause. I light a smoke. I put my glasses down. I take another sip of Busch Light. I take a picture. I'm done not writing. I'm done not branding. I'm going to become a writer. And I'm going to do all that it takes to do it in this digital world. That includes blogging. Blogging displays my talent and help brand me to the world. If that what it takes then...fuck it. Lets roll.
By the way if you like this post please share it on Facebook,Twitter, or whatever. If you like any of my past posts share 'em. If you so happen to read any of my future posts, and like them, share them too. And, if you like my blog feel free to follow the damn thing. Thank you and have a nice day.
Cheers.
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